Well, it's been a while since we graced the Internets with our presence. At least for me...Well..shit went down. What happened? Simply put: I left Stupid. I gathered up six die-hard friends, grabbed my shit, grabbed Kidlette, and high-tailed it the fuck out of there. Served him papers the next day, and now I await with baited breath his response, which has yet to be forthcoming. In the meantime, I do everything I can just to keep my proverbial shit together.
On the one hand, this is easier than I thought it would be. I suppose when you have no other option but to cowgirl up and deal with it, you just do it. I've found inner reserves of strength I didn't know existed. When all I want to do is sink to my nose in a bubble bath because it's been one of those those days, I can't. You just...deal. Because you have no other option.
But, on the flip side, holy shit this is harder than it looks. The mornings are the worst. She isn't a morning person, and well, that makes two of us. I have to be at work a full hour earlier than Stupid, so she's up earlier as well. Putting her to bed earlier doesn't do a rat asshole worth of good, since she doesn't actually sleep sleep until roughly 2100 hours. Financially, this shit sucks balls. My budget is tighter than a nuns cooch. Any unexpected expense could (and already has) put me into a tailspin. Stupid has to be constantly fought with to pay his half of the daycare, and until this court shit is settled, I am not going to see one red cent worth of child support. Apparently, in his galaxy, he's going to get full custody (over my goddamn dead fucking body), and I will pay him child support. Either way, he has made it abundantly clear he isn't paying a dime until the court tells him to. Not unrelatedly, guess who seems to have made it his mission to drag this shit out as long as fucking possible already? Yeah.
However, I have to say holy fuck this is awesome. The sweet, delicious freedom is worth every migraine, every tantrum, every worry about how I'm going to turn a dime into a dollar. Not living with a controlling asshat has made me into a happier, better person. Papa commented that he hadn't seen me this happy in over a decade. Well, guys, I haven't been this happy since I don't know when. Yes, my life has new layers of stress, but also innumerable layers of peace.
So, here's me raising my virtual wine glass to all the absolutely, astoundingly amazing people who supported me, helped me, and continue to do so. Here's to freedom, independance, strength, grit, determination, and all around badassery.
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